Devoted and Foolishly Paid Love

The grand hall was filled to the brim, every seat occupied. Today was Julius Lander’s great day of celebration – his appointment as Chancellor.

Compliments and cheers buzzed in my ears.

I raised my goblet, smiling gracefully, and downed my drink in one go. A drop of wine slipped from the corner of my mouth.

My halfsister, Charlotte, reached out to wipe it away with an ingratiating smile. “Congratulations, sister. It seems you’ve finally reached the end of your long hardships.”

I picked up my goblet once more and, without hesitation, threw the entire cup of wine into her face, washing away the layers of makeup she had so carefully applied.

My smile didn’t falter. “I never forget, dear sister, how you schemed against my mother during my comingofage ceremony.”

Charlotte’s face turned pale, then red, but just as she was about to retaliate, her eyes caught sight of Julius approaching. She bit back her anger, swallowing the humiliation.

“Sister, I have no idea what you’re talking about. If I’ve done anything to upset you, please accept my apologies,” she said, her voice trembling.

I looked at her with disdain and hurled the goblet at her forehead. Blood began to trickle down from the cut, staining her perfect face.

Behind me, I heard hurried footsteps. The crowd was buzzing with excitement, anticipating Charlotte’s downfall.

Everyone knew Julius adored me, respected me, even. A mere scholar, he had once taken up a blade to cut off the hands of a noble who dared lay a finger on me.

But what happened next was beyond anyone’s expectation. Julius grabbed Charlotte and pulled her into his arms, then slapped me across the face with such force that I fell to the ground, half of my face swelling almost instantly.

“How could you be so cruel, Cleo? Charlotte is your sister!” Julius spat out, his voice full of anger.

The hall fell silent, gasps echoing in the stunned silence. No one knew how to react to this sudden turn of events.

Charlotte’s sobs filled the hall, mingling with Julius’s soothing whispers.

“It’s alright, Charlotte. I’m here. You’re safe with me.”

I lowered my gaze, saying nothing.

How laughable. The man I had painstakingly raised to greatness – the man I called my husband – had always been hopelessly in love with another.

I lay on the ground, crimson blood dripping from the corner of my mouth.

The murmurs of the crowd buzzed in my ears, and I was transported back to that humiliating night, the evening of my comingofage ceremony.

My mother had been the most esteemed daughter of the James family, a woman of high status and noble birth. Yet, she defied her family’s wishes to marry my father, who at the time had nothing to his name.

It wasn’t until she was pregnant that she discovered my father already had a mistress – and even a daughter.

On the day I reached womanhood, my mother was falsely accused of adultery by my halfsister’s mother, slandered in front of all the guests. Overcome with grief and despair, she threw herself into the lake, ending her life.

My grandfather, stricken with anger and heartbreak, soon followed, coughing up blood before he passed.

In an instant, I went from being the girl everyone envied to the one they scorned as disgraceful.

Everyone mocked me, everyone except for one person who stepped forward to defend me.

It took just one look, and I never forgot him.

I sought him out, asking around, only to discover he was the young master of the Lander family.

I went to the gates of their estate, where a servant – his pockets lined with the silver I’d given him – smirked and assured me that there was only one young master in their house, and I had found him.

I knew I had little power or influence, so I used my dowry to pressure my father into arranging a marriage with the Landers, hoping to use this connection to seek my revenge.

Once the engagement was set, Julius and I began exchanging letters, and in those dark days, it became one of my few sources of joy.

The sound of the herald outside rang loud and clear, “An imperial decree–”

Everyone rushed past me to greet the announcement, and I slowly stood, dusting off my gown.

There, at the front, a space had been reserved for me.

After all, Julius had mentioned that he would be asking the king to grant a noble title for his betrothed.

Though Julius and I hadn’t married yet, we had been through thick and thin together, and the tale of our loyalty had spread across the kingdom, a story of devotion and love.

I stood still as the herald’s clear voice rang out, “By order of His Majesty, Lady Charlotte Gilbert is to be wed to Julius Lander, the Chancellor. Upon their marriage, she shall be granted the noble title of Marchioness. Let all bear witness and give their acknowledgment.”

Expressions shifted all around us.

In a flash, people swarmed around Charlotte, congratulating her, making the emptiness around me all the more glaring.

Charlotte cast a taunting glance in my direction, even taking my hand to feign comfort.

I pressed my lips together, then heard Julius’s cold, detached voice, “Since things have turned out this way, you may join my household as my mistress.”

I froze, unable to believe he was speaking to me.

I caught the flicker of panic in Charlotte’s eyes and gave a soft laugh. “I am the lady of the House of James. I was born with pride and honor and will never be anyone’s mistress.”

My voice was calm, yet Julius’s eyes widened in shock, his pupils contracting.

He grabbed my throat, his voice cracking with rage, “So, you regret staying by my side all these years?”

My breathing grew labored, but my gaze remained steady. “No, I do not.”

I had never regretted it.

Not because of you, Julius, but because the plans I’d laid over so many years were finally coming to fruition.

Edmund, my beloved, soon... I will have avenged you.

I spared Julius Lander no further glance and turned to leave, making my way alone to a rundown, old cabin.

Perhaps he thought I was ungrateful, for he hadn’t bothered to send anyone to follow me.

Pushing open the door, I was met with the stale scent of decay.

Only one person sat within, illuminated by the dim light of a flickering oil lamp, quietly reciting from a holy text.

She was Edmund’s mother, once a mere servant in the Lander estate, someone everyone had overlooked.

When she saw me, her eyes welled with tears, and she shook her head repeatedly. “You don’t need to go this far. With all you’ve done for Julius over the past three years, for the sake of his reputation, he’ll still keep you in comfort and luxury.”

The countless scars I bore from risking my life for Julius were no secret in the capital. People whispered about the dangers I had faced, the injuries I had endured.

I sat down at the table, picking up a worn prayer book, and began to recite a passage of the requiem.

When I finished, I looked up, my eyes filled with unyielding hatred. “Those who killed Edmund must pay. None of them deserve to live.”

She sighed, shaking her head, and took out an emerald pendant from her sleeve, pressing it into my hand.

I ran my fingers over the smooth surface, tears falling and mingling with the bloodstains that had long since dried upon it.

Outside, the sky was clear and bright, just as it had been on the day Edmund sent this pendant to me through a trusted messenger, promising me that we would one day be together and that he would avenge my mother’s death.

But Edmund had died in his pursuit of the truth, his body never found.

By the time I arrived, all I saw was Julius lying there, covered in blood and barely clinging to life.

In my grief, I had mistaken him for my savior and given my heart to the wrong man.

I tended to Julius’s wounds, cared for him night and day, never leaving his side, while my true love, my Edmund, lay lifeless in the cold, forgotten wilderness of winter.

After ensuring that Edmund’s mother was settled safely, I removed my jewelry and ornaments, dressed in plain white, and made my way toward the estate gates.

But just as I reached them, a servant blocked my path.

From behind, Charlotte’s mocking voice rang out, dripping with contempt. “Sister, your mother was known for her loose morals, and here you are, following a man without any title or status for years. I doubt anyone would want you now. Why don’t I be generous and offer you some gold to ensure you’re taken care of for the rest of your life?”

With a flick of her wrist, the servant behind her poured out a pile of gold onto the ground, waiting smugly for me to grovel and pick it up.

The onlookers murmured amongst themselves, eagerly anticipating my humiliation.

I lifted my head, my eyes bright and clear, and calmly rolled up my sleeve to reveal a deep scar, one that cut down to the bone.

“The first year, when the Lander family’s estate was seized, it wasn’t you by Julius’s side in that wretched, rundown hut – it was me.

“During that winter, when he burned with fever and couldn’t afford medicine, it was I who lay by his side in nothing but my undergarments, using my own body to cool him.

“The second year, when Julius was attacked, it was I who took the fatal blow for him. My arm has never fully recovered.”

“The third year, when Julius finally began to gain some influence, he was poisoned by a rival. I swallowed poison after poison, testing each antidote myself to find the cure. My health has never been the same since.”

…

“Enough,” Julius’s voice cut through the air, cold and sharp. “Then be my mistress, Cleo. But I warn you – don’t push your luck.”

I shook my head, my voice steady and unyielding. “I am the lady of the House of James. I will never be anyone’s mistress.”

I bared my shoulder before everyone, revealing the marks Julius had left behind during his poisoninduced rages, the countless bite marks etched deep into my skin, horrifying to behold.

“I only ask one thing, Chancellor – after all these years, grant me my freedom.”

Silence blanketed the courtyard, so thick you could hear a pin drop.

Julius’s eyes flared with rage, and I watched as his fingernails dug into his palms, drawing blood.

But this time, I didn’t rush forward to tend to his wounds as I once would have.

And it was then that he realized – I no longer loved him.

What he didn’t know was that from the very first day I walked into that rundown hut with him, I had only ever sought revenge.

Julius’s words, though seemingly casual, sent shockwaves through Charlotte’s heart. She caught the hint of his lingering feelings for me.

Desperately, she ordered the servants to throw me out of the estate.

I looked at Julius one last time and caught the fear that flickered in Charlotte’s eyes, knowing I had finally unsettled her.

By defying Julius Lander, I had undoubtedly made an enemy of one of the most influential men in the kingdom.

I had barely reached the entrance of the old Sinclair estate when someone stepped into my path.

I looked up and saw Lady Juliana Lander, Julius’s sister – also a close confidante of Charlotte.

There we stood, facing each other in the middle of the street, neither saying a word.

This was the same spoiled lady who once pointed her finger at me and called me shameless. But after everything that had happened to the Landers, she’d learned a measure of restraint.

Gone were the days of her loud outbursts. Now, she leaned in close, her voice dripping with scorn as she whispered in my ear.

I had no intention of entertaining her and started to walk away, but her next words stopped me in my tracks.

Juliana’s eyes glinted with malice. “You’re just like Edmund – nothing but a filthy, lowborn wretch.”

I lifted my gaze, my eyes cutting into her like a blade.

She smirked, idly toying with a lock of her hair. “Such impure blood, yet he still held the privilege of the eldest son’s title. It was unbearable. So, I asked dear Charlotte for the drugged fumes she used to disgrace your mother. Just a small amount, and it drove Edmund to madness, abandoning his carefully planned legal career to seek out the truth.”

She tilted her head, her smile widening. “He truly was devoted to you. Do you know how he died?”

My nails dug into my palms, and I felt tears rolling down my cheeks against my will.

I had long discovered that Edmund had perished in the dead of winter, his hands and feet broken, left to die alone in the snow with no one to claim his body.

Juliana laughed, watching me tremble with rage and pain.

She pointed to a corner by the Sinclair estate’s outer wall, her tone light and casual. “I had him dragged there that day, so he could see you fussing over my dear brother Julius. I made sure he was conscious, just so he could watch you tending to another man with such care.”

I lost control. I charged at her, only to be pinned to the ground by the servants at her side, unable to even brush the hem of her dress.

Crouching down, Juliana patted my cheek, her voice dripping with disdain. “Cleo, you and Edmund are the same – worthless. Your lives are mine to take whenever I wish.”

With a triumphant sneer, she turned and walked away.

I stumbled over to that corner by the wall, my heart shattering as I imagined the despair Edmund must have felt in his final moments.

I forced down the bitter taste rising in my throat.

Juliana, Charlotte… both of you deserve to die.

I looked up at the sky and wondered, perhaps, I too was fated to meet the same end.